I don’t know what was with me all weekend, but I was in one of the worst moods ever. Not the whole weekend – I actually had fun and was productive and enjoyed myself for portions – but there were spans of time this weekend where I was pretty freaking insufferable. I needed a break from myself.
I’m not sure why. The farthest I got was that I was irritated over “waste” – wasting time, wasting energy, wasting opportunities…I noticed that I mentioned “waste” a fair few times as the weekend went on. I couldn’t stand it, and it seemed to happen no matter what I was doing.
I wonder if it has something to do with last weekend being the calm before the two-almost-solid weeks-of-travel storm that starts up tomorrow morning. There never seems to be enough time, or enough done, or enough fun, or enough…anything. “Not enough/not good enough” is another big concept that has been around in my life forever, but has been rearing its pretty little head lately. It’s hard not to get completely frustrated with myself when I feel like I’ve “wasted” opportunities to enjoy life, but I suppose that too is also inside of this whole “not good enough” shtick that’s happening.
Woof. Weekend fail. Ah, well. Onward and upward.